Losing my marbles but not losing pounds

Here i am again, and i'm still not under 9st! It's getting really painful and tiresome going up and down the very last few lbs, but not under.

Over the last few days i've eaten healthy and not purged, eaten nothing, purged, downed diet pills, laxatives and diuretics, drunk extra water, then no water at all. My body doesn't seem to be reacting the way i imagined with any of it - the weight STILL STAYS ON! argh!

I have gone down a bit today but that might be because my scales got so fed up of me standing on them, they gave me a pity reading and decided 'lets just give her this otherwise she'll try to stand on us again!'

My run yesterday was tough and i had permanent stitches on either side of my rib cage. They re-appeared when walking around town today. I know it's probably to do with electrolyte depletion and dehydration, but if i drink i will probably pile on 3lbs that i scrimped to lose so hard. I really am at a loss. I think instead i wil go to sleep and down a glass of something tomorrow morning as a reward for holding out.

I have been buying smaller clothes. I bought my first UK size 6 (guessing thats a US 2) top today and a size 8 (4) work trousers for an upcoming interview. I don't know how i'm buying these given that i don't feel i've lost any weight in like, ohhhhh.....a CENTURY! But hey-ho, i guess i've just got to keep going.

It's hard because i am getting all this mounting pressure and attention from others about my size, and yet i'm not losing any faster. I want to get to my goal weight before anyone starts really kicking up a stink about things. My mum has already said again about the doctors and today both my parents said that they really didn't want to drag me down there. I think even if they drove me down there without me knowing, i'd jump out the car and march away. Even if they got me into the surgery, i wouldn't wait. If i don't want help, there isn't much they can do given the fact that i am still in the healthy weight bracket (you hearing me mother??? healthy BMI!)

Today started off well, but my weight when i got home sucked, so i binged/purged on chocolate (typical). In the evening, i had 1/3 omlette, salad and 12 grapes. I purged some of it up later for the sake of it. Later in the evening, i binged/purged on a packet of chocolate that my sister and i had driven into town for especially.

Quick Bites:

Binged / Purged - Thrice

Exercise - walking around town doesn't feel as though it should count really...

Weight - 129lbs

Pulse (BPM) - 48bpm

So now i'm going to get some sleep because i have work tomorrow and i'm probably going to have a bad day because i will have probably not lost anything by the morning! :/

God i'm such a sourpuss tonight!

Hope you are all having more successful weeks than mine,

Poppy xox